


What It's All About

by secondalto



Category: Stargate Atlantis
Genre: Aliens Make Them Do It, Humor, M/M, Team
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-03-02
Updated: 2010-03-02
Packaged: 2017-10-07 16:30:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,151
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/66941
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/secondalto/pseuds/secondalto
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A different kind of ritual for the team to perform.</p>
            </blockquote>





	What It's All About

**Author's Note:**

> Written for amystar who won me at Sweet Charity.

The people of PR6-554 were an unusual bunch. First of all, they had sought out the Atlanteans instead of the Atlanteans finding them. Secondly, it was a serious trip to reach their planet. For some reason the gate wouldn’t dial straight there. It took a puddlejumper trip to New Athos and then three gate trips to get there. And lastly, it was looking like they didn’t want anything except friendship and basic trade with Atlantis. Lately it seemed that allies wanted promises of military might or help in exchange for a treaty. Not the Avalans, as they called themselves.

They had approached the Athosians at a planetary market that many tribes and colonies attended. Teyla had relayed the story to her team. The Avalans had asked about meeting the Atlanteans, about possibly engaging in a straight treaty, no trade necessarily involved. It had been such an unusual request that Halling himself had come to Atlantis to extend the invitation. Since returning to New Athos, Halling preferred not to travel.

So Woolsey had approved the trip. It was their first outing since Atlantis had returned to the Pegasus galaxy. John was eager to get back into the routine of things. The time on Earth hadn’t been all that great. Once the SGC had sent their own personnel to the city, everyone had been shipped back to Colorado to be debriefed. Instead of being out on the ocean he’d been stuck underground for almost three weeks before the IOA and the SGC had decided that Atlantis could return to its home. Some of the scientists, Zelenka included, were still there trying to explain the wormhole drive. He’d been lucky to get Rodney back.

“Pretty planet,” he commented after they’d stepped through the gate. “Is it far to the village?”

“No,” Teyla replied. “I was told that there would be a representative to meet us.”

It wasn’t long before they saw a small group walking through the field towards them. John stood a little straighter, glancing at his team. They were ready, eager to get back to what they did best. The woman on the far left stepped ahead of the group and approached Teyla.

“Teyla Emmagen of Athos?”

“I am Teyla. May I introduce Lieutenant Colonel John Sheppard, Doctor Rodney McKay and Ronon Dex of Atlantis. “

The woman bowed. “I am Halla of Avalan, I welcome you. We have a banquet in preparation for you. My father, the leader of our people, is eager to meet you.  Let us go.”

She turned and the team followed her, mingling with the group. The smaller man engaged in conversation with Rodney, the taller with Ronon. Halla spoke with Teyla. John was alone, but he didn’t mind. It allowed him to keep an eye on the terrain, to look out for traps and escape routes. The land reminded him of the American midwest. Slightly rolling hills and wooded areas, farmland with burgeoning crops, small lakes and rivers, a prosperous place. He wondered if they had ever been visited by the Wraith, though he doubted it given all the trouble it had taken for them to get there.

The village was just over a rise, sprawling out before them. Their arrival triggered a stop in all the activity. Small children ran around them, villagers watched as they passed, Halla calling to all that the feast would be celebrated in about an hour.

“It is not often that we have visitors. You have come at an auspicious occasion. It is the festival honoring our goddess of fertility, she has given us a bountiful harvest.”

John groaned inwardly. Fertility festivals tended to involve fertility rites. That meant either marriages or sex. The team was shown to a hut where Halla said they could relax and clean up before the feast. She left them and closed the door behind her. John turned to his team.

“So…?”

“I know nothing of their rituals, John. I cannot tell you what this festival might entail. What little I know of the Avalans suggests that it will not be sexual in nature.”

There was a collective sigh of relief. “So marriage is still a possibility?” Rodney asked.

Teyla nodded.

“What’s the count?” Ronon asked.

“Let me see,” Rodney said, counting on his fingers. “As of the last count, we’ve been married as a group twenty times. Teyla has been married to John nineteen times, Ronon fifteen and me ten. Ronon’s been married to John eight times, me six. And still the winner is John and me married to each other a grand total of twenty-nine times.”

“Thirty,” John corrected. “You forgot that time on PX9-467. You were drunk.”

“Oh yes, thirty. Not that any of them will get recognized on Earth.”

“Hey, Iowa and Vermont just got same sex marriage laws on the books.”

Rodney scoffed. “Pfft. Canadian provinces started recognizing them in 2003.”

“Maybe when I retire, Rodney.”

They were stopped from further conversation by a knock on the door and Halla looking in. “It is time for the feast,” she said. They were led to a large building, probably the central meeting place. There were a few speeches before they could eat, making Rodney increasingly grouchy. And there was the usual trying to explain what citrus was. Soon enough they were eating and there was friendly conversation all around them. John was just waiting for the announcement of the rites that would be performed. The eating went on for hours, the team stuffing themselves. Then Halla’s father stood.

“Colonel Sheppard I would like to invite your team to participate in the ritual of worship with us. It would cement our relationship with your people.”

Damn. John couldn’t turn the guy down now. “It would be our honor.”

The entire village stood and the team did the same. Halla led them out of the building. John was expecting to head for a temple or church of some kind. Instead they were shown to a large field. A public rite, John hated them. They were instructed to stand in certain places, all of them ending up in a circle. Rodney was on his left. The leader began chanting, Halla translating. It was a general praising of the goddess, thanks and promises of sacrifices in her name. Then they were instructed to put their left arm inside the circle. It was followed by more chanting. Left arm outside of the circle, chanting. Back inside the circle, chanting. Then turning around in place, chanting. By the time they got to the right leg, John was getting suspicious. He sidled closer to Rodney.

“Does this remind you of anything?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“We’re doing the Hokey Pokey, Rodney!” he hissed as he shook his leg.

“At least it’s not a public sex rite. The butt’s up next, so get ready to shake that ass, John,” he grinned.

John frowned and turned himself around.

 


End file.
